（Jeniffer 去世前與主人公在醫院的最后時刻）
........

That evening, she kicked me out of the room. She wanted to speak to her father 'man to man.'那天晚上，她(珍妮佛-女主人公)讓我離開房間，她要和她父親做一次大人之間的談話。

'This meeting is restricted only to Americans of Italian descent,' she said, looking as white asher pillows, 'so beat it, Barrett.' “這個會議只局限于意大利后裔的美國人”，她說，“離去吧，巴雷特”  - 這個會議指珍妮和父親菲力(phil)的談話。

'Okay,' I said. “好的”，我說。

'But not too far,'she said when I reached the door.“不要走遠了”，當我走到門口時，她說到。

I went to sit in the lounge. Presently Phil appeared. 我去到休息間坐著等，很快看到Phil過來了。

'She says to get your ass in there,' he whispered hoarsely, like the whole inside of him was hollow.'I'm gonna buy some cigarettes.'“她說讓你過去”，他低聲說著，聲音嘶啞，好像是在一個山洞中�！拔胰ベI煙去�！�   ---- get your ass in there, 把屁股挪過去。

'Close the goddamn door,' she commanded as I entered the room. “把該死的門關上”，當我進屋時，她命令到。
I obeyed, shut the door quietly,and as I went back to sit by her bed, I caught a fuller view of her. I mean,with the tubes going into her right arm, which she would keep under the covers.I always liked to sit very close and just look at her face, which, however pale, still had her eyes shining in it. 我按她的要求安靜地把門關上，回到她床邊坐下，全面仔細地看她。我是說，她的右臂上插著一些管子，這些管子把她遮住了。我總是喜歡坐在她身邊，就只是看著她。此刻她的面孔有點蒼白，眼睛依然閃亮。

So I quickly sat very close. 我坐到她身邊，緊靠著她。

'It doesn't hurt,Ollie, really,' she said. 'It's like falling off a cliff in slow motion, you know?' “不要緊，奧利弗”，她說，“就像是用慢動作從懸崖上墜落，知道嗎？”

Something stirred deep in my gut. Some shapeless thing that was going to fly into my throat and make me cry. But I wasn't going to. I never have. I'm a tough bastard, see? I am not gonna cry. 有些東西在我肚子里攪動，好像有無形的東西要飛到我的嗓子，讓我哭泣。但我不能哭，不應哭。瞧，我就是個完完全全的混蛋，我不會哭。

But if I'm not gonna cry, then I can't open my mouth. I'll simply have to nod yes. So I nodded yes.但是如果不哭出來，我無法張嘴說話。我只有簡單地點頭說是。于是我點了點頭。

'Bullshit,' she said. “狗屎”，她說。

'Huh?' It was more of a grunt than a word.“嗯？”她只是嘟囔一下。

'You don't know about falling off cliffs, Preppie,' she said. 'You never fell off one in your god damn life.'“你不知道從懸崖上掉下來是怎么回事，預科生�！彼�說道。“在你該死的生活中，你又從來沒有掉下去過�！�

'Yeah,' I said,recovering the power of speech. 'When I met you.'“是”，我說，我已經恢復了語言能力，“在我遇到你之前”

'Yeah,' she said, anda smile crossed her face. ''Oh, what a falling off was there.' Who said that?' “是”，她說，臉上一片笑容�！芭�，那是多大的差距啊 - 那是誰說得？”

'I don't know,' I replied. 'Shakespeare.' “我不知道，”我回答到，“莎士比亞�！�

'Yeah, but who?' she said kind of plaintively. 'I can't remember which play, even. I went to Radcliffe,I should remember things. I once knew all the Mozart Köchel listings.' “是啊，還有誰？”她用平靜地神態說道。“我都不知道是誰在演戲。我到了拉德克利夫，我應該能記得的，我曾經記得完整的莫扎特的清單。”

'Big deal,' I said.“了不起”，我說。

'You bet it was,' she said, and then screwed up her forehead, asking, 'What number is the C MinorPiano Concerto?'“你敢賭？”她說道，眉頭皺了起來，問道�！癈小調剛琴協奏曲的編號是多少？” ---- 指莫扎特的C小調鋼琴協奏曲No24吧？

'I'll look it up,' Isaid.“我查一下”，我說。

I knew just where.Back in the apartment, on a shelf by the piano. I would look it up and tell herfirst thing tomorrow.我知道在哪里，回到公寓，在鋼琴邊上的書架上。我要看一下，明天第一件事告訴她。

'I used to know,'Jenny said, 'I did. I used to know.'“我以前記得，”珍妮說道，“真的，我以前記得�！�

'Listen,' I said,Bogart style, 'do you want to talk music?'“聽著，”我用鮑加的語調說到，“你要談論音樂嗎？” --- Humphrey Bogart，美國電影演員。

'Would you prefer talking funerals?' she asked.“難道你準備談葬禮？”她問道。

'No,' I said, sorry for having interrupted her.“不，”我說，很后悔打斷了她的話題。

'I discussed it with Phil. Are you listening, Ollie?' “我跟菲力說過了。你在聽嗎，奧利？”

I had turned my face away. 我把臉轉到了一邊。

'Yeah, I'm listening,Jenny.'“是的，珍妮，我在聽�！�

'I told him he could have a Catholic service, you'd say okay. Okay?' “我告訴他可以按照天主教的儀式辦理，你同意吧。好不？”

'Okay,' I said.“好。”我說到。

'Okay,' she replied.“好�！彼�重復到。

And then I felt slightly relieved, because after all, whatever we talked of now would have to be an improvement. 我感到有點點釋然，無論如何，后面的談話都不會有所改變了。

I was wrong. 我錯了。

'Listen, Oliver,'said Jenny, and it was in her angry voice, albeit soft. 'Oliver, you've got to stop being sick!' “聽著，奧利，”珍妮說道，她的聲音盡管很柔，但幾乎要憤怒了，“奧利，你不能再這樣消沉了。”

'Me?'“我？”

'That guilty look on your face, Oliver, it's sick.'“看看你臉上的土灰樣，太消沉了。”

Honestly, I tried to change my expression, but my facial muscles were frozen.老實說，我想盡可能表現好點，可是面部肌肉總好像僵了一樣。

'It's nobody's fault,you preppie bastard,' she was saying. 'Would you please stop blaming yourself!' “這不是誰的錯，你個破預科生，”她在一直說，“不要再責怪自己了。” ----

I wanted to keep looking at her because I wanted to never take my eyes from her, but still I had to lower my eyes, I was so ashamed that even now Jenny was reading my mind so perfectly.我想一直看著她，不想把我的目光從她身上移開，但我還是不得不低下頭，我感到如此難過，珍妮這個時候還是那樣關心我。

'Listen, that's the only goddamn thing I'm asking, Ollie. Otherwise, I know you'll be okay.'“聽著，那是我唯一想知道的事。奧利，我知道，你一定會沒事的�！�

That thing in my gut was stirring again, so I was afraid to even speak the word 'okay.' I just looked mutely at Jenny.我的腸胃再次翻攪起來，甚至再也說不出一個“沒事的”。我只有靜靜地看著珍妮。

'Screw Paris,' she said suddenly.“Screw Paris”, 她突然說道。

'Huh?' “嗯？”

'Screw Paris and music and all the crap you think you stole from me. I don't care, you sonovabitch.Can't you believe that?' “Screw Paris 和音樂和其他你想從我這里偷到的雜碎，我都不在乎，你個混蛋。你不相信嗎？”

'No,' I answered truthfully. “不，”我老實回答道。

'Then get the hell out of here,' she said. 'I don't want you at my goddamn deathbed.'“不信就從這里滾出去，”她說，“我不想你在這里給我送葬。”

She meant it. I could tell when Jenny really meant something. So I bought permission to stay by telling a lie: 她說的是真的。我清楚地知道珍妮的意思，于是我要說謊，以便留下來。

'I believe you,' I said.“我信你”，我說。

'That's better,' she said. 'Now would you do me a favor?' “那樣最好”，她說，“好，現在給我幫個忙好嗎？”

From somewhere inside me came this devastating assault to make me cry. But I withstood. I would not cry. I would merely indicate to Jennifer - by the affirmative nodding of myhead - that I would be happy to do her any favor whatsoever.我突然感到一種毀滅性打擊讓我要哭出來。但我忍了，我不要哭。我肯定地向珍妮點點頭 - 不管她說什么我都會照著做。
'Would you please hold me very tight?' she asked. “緊緊抱著我，好嗎？”她問道。

I put my hand on her forearm - Christ, so thin - and gave it a little squeeze. 我把手放在她小臂上 - 天啊，這么消瘦 - 稍稍用力。

'No, Oliver,' she said, 'really hold me. Next to me.' “不，奧利”，她說，“真的抱著我，靠著我。”

I was very, very careful - of the tubes and things - as I got onto the bed with her and put my arms around her. 我非常小心，非常小心 - 那么多管子還有其它 - 到床上，用雙臂抱著她的身體。

'Thanks, Ollie.'“謝謝，奧利”

Those were her lastwords. 這是她留下的最后的話。